Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Lucky, me

New DBT post. Check it. I would love to take DBT to like the Austin Chronicle or the LA Weekly. I'm pretty sure we're super qualified.

***

That book I'm going to write still hasn't made it from thought to keypad. Part of it is that I think I have to have some conclusion drawn before I set out writing it. Is that how it's supposed to happen? Do novelists know the end of the story before they begin? The thing is, I have only impressions and threads of cognition ... I have paths I want to take, and leads I want to follow, but nothing in the way of answers. I have impressions and hypotheses, and there's no rush, but since I get sentences here and there it seems like I'm supposed to be *doing* something. Isn't that my story?

***

Did you know that NYE is right around the corner? This used to be my favorite holiday, right after my birthday, because I love the idea of new *anything* (remember I'm the girl who gets excited over groceries). This year it's enough that I'm going to be in Austin, hanging out with friends. I'm not placing any undue expectations on the countdown evening, and I don't aspire to see the night through to sunrise. Also, I live with my prospect for a new years kiss and since neither of us are lesbian, the turning of the clock doesn't hold much luster. Tell me I'm not granny.

***
In follow up news, karma's a mother. Even when I think I can joke w/ it, outrun it, box it around a little, whatever, it's on me like a cold sore. In teaching there's this saying that we teach what we want to learn (actually I think that's from the Course). I guess what's up for me is that nothing is insignificant; all actions have purpose and karma's not good, it's not bad, it just is. I ate chips and creamed spinach for dinner tonight and now I feel puke. And I'm still a super lucky girl.

***
YJ's in two weeks! I'm going up late since I have to work. The fact that I get to see a bunch of friends when I assist is pure bonus. I mentioned I'm lucky right?

No comments: