I'd prefer to know the answer to these questions:

1. Is kissing someone w/ collagen-injected lips similar to feeling up silicon-implants? (I can't speak on either account, Mom.)

2a. Does that chick from Missing Persons still wear vinyl when she performs?
2b. She has to be like 60 now?
2c. What's the age-trajectory for vinyl?

3. WHO clicks on pop-up ads?

4. If you were me, would you go see The Virgins tomorrow night?

5a. Alo, did you know there's a band called ALO?
5b. Jealous much?